DJ Khaled’s Words of Wisdom

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Is DJ Khaled the modern day advice guru? Just when we thought we’d heard the last of DJ Khaled’s signature lyrics, “Anotha One” and “DJ KHALED!” the man himself emerged, dropping the motivational video of 201 5, or dare I say it, our lifetime?

Ok, probably not. But the rotund renaissance man who brought us such hits as “All I Do is Win” and “I’m on One” provides us with the motivation we need to get through whatever we’re dealing with. Hard work week? Khaled’s got you. Bad break up? Never fear, Khaled is here.

In the video entitled “Wise Words With DJ Khaled,” the founder of the We The Best Music Group spits the ego boost you need, retorting “You Smart. You Very Smart. You a Genius” He discusses hinges (???) and fuckboys and ends with the motivation you need to get through pushups (Or if you’re like me, the motivation you need to finish the box of cookies): his signature phrase “Anotha One.”

While DJ Khaled’s words may not seem to be as powerful as you’d think, I watched this video (along with Ludacris’ “Get Back” because that shit always gets me going) at least ten times before I took the LSAT and I felt pumped up. Now I’m not sure how I did on the actual test, but who cares? DJ Khaled thinks I’m smart. He thinks I’m very smart, actually. In fact, he thinks I’m a genius! So there, LSAC! (Sorry, I take it back. Please don’t let this affect my score)

Anyway, I was so inspired by DJ Khaled’s video that I decided to add the Palestinian prodigy on Snapchat. And may I just say, best Snapchat add ever? Let me tell you, folks. I’ve added Mo Speights on Snapchat and he is incomprehensible. I’ve added The Lonely Island and while they’re entertaining, they just draw shit on their faces. Anyway, they are no match for DJ Khaled.

DJ Khaled teaches you the key (emojis) to life. Whether it’s by watering the plants in his massive Miami backyard or rubbing cocoa butter all over his man boobs while he shakes the phone vigorously, the virtuoso who changed the game with “I’m So Hood” takes us on the adventure that is his life.

 

Referring to an elusive “they,” Khaled warns us about what “they” don’t want you to do. This warning has inspired its own website and has social media poppin’ with Khaled’s other catchphrases.

His story is filled with apple Ciroc trees, Diddy/Rozay cameos, elliptical workouts and even fan appearances. Everyday, we look forward to Chef Dee’s unenthusiastic listing of the meals she’s made for the artist. Never will we forget the terror we felt when Khaled got lost at sea on his jet ski while he tried to get back from Rick Ross’ home (wtf?!) at night.

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Prayer hands emoji is a major key when you’re lost at sea.

From voraciously watering the leaves of his plants to zooming in and out on his lion statue while he yells “LYAAAAN,” DJ Khaled’s Snapchat story has quickly become the only one I follow (as ridiculous as following a Snapchat story sounds). I look forward to joining DJ Khaled on his 2016 antics, whatever those may be. Meanwhile, praise to the most high for the man himself: DJ KHALED.

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